I’ve gotta be honest with you guys for a second, I’m ecstatic Week 1 is over.
Don’t get me wrong, I couldn’t be more excited about having football back. Baseball was really starting to weigh on me and despite the fact that I’m now making picks for three different sports for the first time ever, it’s much better than solely dealing with the roulette wheel that is baseball betting. It’s really not good for your psyche, regardless of what the Twitter geniuses with their 52-17 MLB records in their bio would have you believe.
At the same time, though, the crapshoot that is Week 1 in the NFL can come at you fast.
You really have no idea what to expect. I’ve always been a Lamar Jackson believer, but I never would’ve guessed that he would throw for five touchdowns in the season opener, or the fact that he would orchestrate an offensive attack that hung a Madden-like 59 points on the soon-to-be-fire-selling Miami Dolphins. On another note, no one expected the Phins to be good, but they have a real shot at going 0-16. These guys are capital-b bad. It’ll be hilarious when they inevitably beat the Jets in New York though. At the very least, they’ll probably cover the soon-to-be 13.5-point spread in that Week 14 match-up when the Jets are like 4-8 or something. Looking forward to that one.
Anyway, I digress. A few more surprises, the Raiders look like they might be a tough out. All three of those 2019 first rounders were as advertised, and Tyrell Williams looked every bit like a No. 1 receiver. Side note: I literally never want to hear Antonio Brown’s name again, and not even because of the fact that soon-to-be Vegas scored 24 points without him. The news cycle beat that storyline into the ground. I liked the dude, had him in a few leagues over the years, obviously one of – if not the best – receivers in the league. I don’t really care about the Raiders either, I’ve heard far too much about them and it honestly baffles me that sports media has such an infatuation with a team that hasn’t won a playoff game since 2002. Point being, I don’t really care about either party involved, I just think I shouldn’t have to hear the same name 20 times a day for a month straight. All I know is this is the worst-case scenario for the rest of the league. The Patriots just found the last Infinity Stone, and Bill Belichick is about to snap.
That was my obligatory comment on A.B., here’s hoping sports media can resist the urge to talk about him for at least a week.
Beyond that, I think the Bucs offense sputtering in Bruce Arians’ debut was a little crazy, the Titans probably deserved a little more love, Austin Ekeler was, like, next-level good (Melvin who?), the Colts aren’t going anywhere, Dak Prescott might actually be worth the money and, finally, the Saints and Eagles are still the NFL’s best shot and keeping Tom Brady and Bill Belichick from a seventh ring. Of course, that’s if the Patriots make it past the Kansas City Chiefs and Houston Texans in the AFC.
Oh, last thing, Kyler Murray isn’t bad.